题目 关于大学里面男学生和女学生是不是应该一样多
Gender discrimination is always a topic in our society. Nowadays, an issue（应该是the issue，因为表示特指） under discussion is whether equal numbers of male and female students should be enrolled in every subject by universityies（拼写！）. In my opinion, it is benificial to put emphasis on sexual equality. However, the request of accepting same（前面要加the,属于固定用法） numbers of boys and girls in every subject is overly simplistic.
点评：从结构和内容上来说，还不错，符合要求：前两句话过渡一下，交待背景信息，最后表达自己的观点。本段作者是通过两句话来表达观点，也未尝不可。
从语言角度来说，没有严重的'错误，从句也得到了运用，但是还是有错。
There are mainly two reasons for me to say so.（过于口语化的表达。而且这句话就代表了本段要写两个分论点！这不是一种preferred的写法，既然有两个原因，为什么不能写成两段呢？！这样结构不是更加清晰么。） Firstly, individuals have their own rights to choose the subjects they enjoy. Thus, it is hard to say whether the number of these two different genders will coincidentally be the same in the end. Secondly,（这里开始应该另起一段） the society calls for different things from males and females. According to my experience, we have a special school named ”Female school” in our university, the main subjects of which are intermedia, individual image design, photography and so on. Only girls can get enrolled in this school because the main goal of this school is to cultivate girls that not only can stand on their own fet（拼写！） after graduation, but also live a good life while they act as mothers or housewives in the future. There is no doubt that males and females will act different roles in society after graduation.
点评： 结构上已经说过了，最好分成两段。内容上来说，两个分论点写地一般，第一个分论点后面的扩展太少；第二个分论点本身太抽象，表达地不清楚。
语法上还可以，错误并不多，但是好像没什么特别精彩的地方。
Admittedly, up till now, sex discrimination remains a problem. The emphasis on equal education opportunities for both boys and girls is exactly a must, especially in rural areas. However, since boys and girls are born with different gifts and missions, the extreme equivalence is somehow a myth. Only when the gender differences are eliminated can this extreme equivalence come true.
点评： 这段写得还不错，内容、结构和句型上都比较顺。
In conclusion, I admit the importance of equal education opportunities for both males and females. But just like the harm sex discrimination will do, an emphasis on extreme equality of these two genders is also detrimental.
这段写得也很不错。
总评：全文后半部分写得还不错，主要就是第一段有些问题。貌似可以给个6.5-7分吧。
开头
1， Recently, the problem of … has aroused people's concern. 最近,……问题已引起人们的关注.
2，The Internet has been playing an increasingly important role in our day-to-day life. It has brought a lot of benefits but has created some serious problems as well.
互联网已在我们的生活中扮演着越来越重要的角色.它给我们带来了许多好处,但也产生了一些严重的问题.
3， Nowadays, (overpopulation) has become a problem we have to face.
如今，(人口过剩)已成为我们不得不面对的问题了.
4，It is commonly believed that … / It is a common belief that … 人们一般认为……
5，Many people insist that … 很多人坚持认为……
6，With the development of science and technology, more and more people believe that…
随着科技的发展,越来越多的人认为……
7，A lot of people seem to think that … 很多人似乎认为……
引出不同观点
1，People's views on … vary from person to person. Some hold that …. However, others believe that….人们对……的观点因人而异.有些人认为……，然而其他人却认为……
2，People may have different opinions on …人们对……可能会有不同的见解.
3，Attitudes towards (drugs) vary from person to person.人们对待吸毒的态度因人而异.
4，There are different opinions among people as to …关于……，人们的观点大不相同.
5，Different people hold different attitudes toward (failure). 对(失败)人们的态度各不相同。
结尾
1，Taking all these factors into consideration, we naturally come to the conclusion that…
把所有这些因素加以考虑,我们自然会得出结论……
2，Hence/Therefore, we'd better come to the conclusion that …
因此,我们最好得出这样的结论……
3，There is no doubt that (job-hopping) has its drawbacks as well as merits.
毫无疑问,跳槽有优点也有缺点.
4，All in all, we cannot live without … But at the same time we must try to find out new ways to cope with the problems that would arise.
总之,我们没有…是无法生活的.但同时,我们必须寻求新的解决办法来对付可能出现的新问题.
提出建议
1，It is high time that we put an end to the (trend).该是我们停止这一趋势的时候了.
2，There is no doubt that enough concern must be paid to the problem of …
毫无疑问,对……问题应予以足够的重视.
4，Obviously, … If we want to do something … , it is essential that …
显然,如果我们想做某事,很重要的是…
5，Only in this way can we … 只有这样，我们才能……
6，It must be realized that …我们必须意识到……
预示后果
1，Obviously, if we don't control the problem, the chances are that … will lead us in danger.
很明显,如果我们不能控制这一问题,很有可能我们会陷入危险.
该是采纳……的建议，并对……的进展给予特殊重视的时候了。
2，No doubt, unless we take effective measures, it is very likely that …
毫无疑问,除非我们采取有效措施,很可能会……
3，It is urgent that immediate measures should be taken to stop the situation.
很紧迫的是,应立即采取措施阻止这一事态的发展.
论证
1，From my point of view, it is more reasonable to support the first opinion rather than the second. 在我看来,支持第一种观点比支持第二种观点更有道理.
2，I cannot entirely agree with the idea that …我无法完全同意这一观点……
3，Personally, I am standing on the side of …就个人而言,我站在……的一边.
4，I sincerely believe that …我真诚地相信……
5，In my opinion, it is more advisable to do … than to do ….
在我个人看来,做……比做……更明智.
给出原因
1， This phenomenon exists for a number of reasons. First, … Second, … Third, …
这一现象的存在是有许多原因的.首先，……;第二,，……;第三，……
2， Why did …? For one thing …，for another …. Perhaps the primary reason is…
为什么会……?一个原因是……，令一个原因是……;或许其主要原因是……
3，I quite agree with the statement that … The reasons are chiefly as follows.
我十分赞同这一论述,即……，其主要原因如下:
列出解决办法
1，Here are some suggestions for handling … 这是如何处理某事的一些建议.
2，The best way to solve the troubles is … 解决这些麻烦的最好办法是……
3，People have figured out many ways to solve this problem. 人们已找出许多办法来解决这个问题.
批判错误观点和做法:
1，As far as something is concerned, … 就某事而言，……
2， It was obvious that …很显然,….
3，It may be true that …, but it doesn't mean that …
可能……是对的,但这并不意味着……
4，It is natural to believe that …, but we shouldn't ignore that …
认为……是很自然的,但我们不应忽视……
5，There is no evidence to suggest that … 没有证据表明……
不同意
I would certainly oppose changing the system [+ ing form of verb]
She's opposed to religious education in schools.--be opposed to sth to disagree -with a principle or plan:---
Are you for or against my proposal
He objects to the label 'magician' which he is often given.
Her objection to/against the plan is based on incorrect facts
同意
Have they assented to (= agreed to) the terms of the contract?－－『Formal』
She advocates taking a more long-term view.[+ ing form of verb]
He advocates the return of capital punishment.
I think you were quite justified in complaining『having a good reason for something』
I generally favour travelling by night, when the roads are quiet.
But the federal Training Minister disputes crisis calls from employers,
问题出现
One of the disquieting facts stemming from this is that plastic bags can become serial killers
This has resulted in a ban on plastic bags being imposed there early in 2002.
an increasingly crowded curriculum, maths is being sidelined.
township hospitals are running at a loss or are on the verge of collapse.
The world's tropical forests continue to disappear with disheartening speed
from September through to December airborne pollen from olive blossoms is contributing to asthma and hay fever problems
But recently a new trend has been evident - one person living in a house
the rise and rise of the single person household.
问题原因
This could be due to the fact that HDPE bags can not be put out for collection with other household recyclables
The problem arises partly because charities have outposts in areas of conflict:
Another cause for concern,the use of (DU), may also be less of a problem than many fear
Another current concern about China is that ......
The PCAU has found that even though bombs, troop movements and landmines caused awful problems in Afghanistan, the most serious long-term consequences have resulted from the uncontrolled use of resources, particularly the cutting of
t says the drain is symptomatic of a maths crisis that has its origins in the classroom.
But that had more to do with the collapse of investment in America than with the rise in China
The pact of 2000 owed more to Nelson Mandela's patient mediation than to the Burundian elite's own desire for peace
解决问题
the world woke up to the issue
Different countries have adopted a range of approaches to discourage the use of plastic bags in an attempt to cut down on the number of bags finding their way into the environment
the government has implemented new regulations that will see only thicker, more durable plastic bags produced.
Recycling your plastic shopping bags is one of the most obvious courses of action
Given the costs and inconvenience associated with recycling, and the fact that reuse only delays the plastic entering the environment, the most sensible option is to cut down on the number of plastic bags that you use, or stop using them altogether.
There are a range of alternatives to plastic bags
The seriousness of any of these problems will depend largely on the length and severity of the war, and on how quickly aid agencies can get in afterwards.
Rather than fight through the courts park by park, reserve by reserve, theGovernment has opted to negotiate with them.
Faced with those perennial challenges renewables like solar
power are becoming more viable options, particularly in smaller, more remote communties.
坏的影响
A rise in interest rates would severely retard economic growth.(延缓)
High winds have hindered firefighters in their efforts to put out the blaze（阻）
irreversible destruction of rainforests
Storms hampered the American-led advance on the city, bringing some convoys to a standstill(to prevent someone doing something easily)
They were warned of the ecological catastrophe to come( sudden event that causes very great trouble or destruction)
The emigration of scientists is a catastrophe for the country(a bad situation)
The approaching cyclone could exact a huge toll（cause a lot of damage; cause many deaths:）
Flash floods cause havoc in Thai capital
The last few months have seen the progressive meltdown of the country's political system.( complete failure, especially in financial matters)
Fighting and shortages have brought normal life to a virtual standstill in the city(a condition in which all movement or activity has stopped)
spell a diseaster
cheating generates numerous unfavorable results
What concerns many people is that the long term effects of consuming such foods cannot be predicted
Once let loose into the environment, plastic bags can cause considerable harm, blocking drains and suffocating wildlife mistaking the bag for food.
Plastic shopping bags have a surprisingly significant environmental impact for something so seemingly innocuous
As well as being an eyesore (next time you are outside, have a look around - you'll be amazed at the number of plastic bags littering our streets and waterways), plastic shopping bags kill large numbers of wildlife each year.『句型 as well as +ing ,』
China's success at building bikes has undermined production of two-wheeled vehicles everywhere
But away from the orderly plantings and the managed olive groves, there's apotentially disastrous downside. In the foothills, some are calling it and environmental calamity.
影响程度
The fire caused considerable damage to the church.
She's been a tremendous (= very great) help to me over the last few months
The radiation leak has had a disastrous effect on/upon the environment.
near historically unprecedented levels
表数量
a large number of
overwelming number of
a fraction of ...a small part of
enormous proportion of
the majority ..the minority.
Widows make up the bulk of the group but their proportion is declining,
好的影响
There's a flourishing trade in second-hand video machines.
His business thrived in the years before the war
a thriving economy
The leisure industry is booming (= is very successful) .
Newspaper stands is growing briskly
其它
its phenomenally fast growth can be sustained only at the expense of other economies, both developed and developing。
labour-intensive textile and clothing sector
Shoes, semiconductors and televisions are expected to follow
Inevitably, as China grows, some countries will find their competitive position altered
Moreover, the raw numbers exaggerate the picture
By contrast, when it comes to computers, cars or semiconductors-capital-intensive goods, in other
