搞笑英语话剧剧本
12分钟好象有点长，我这里有我参加“星星火炬英语风采大赛”的剧本。
参考一下额 Time ancient times. Character Mister Dongguo, wolf, hunter, old apricot tree, Lao Niu, old farmer. In wilderness the mist and dust is billowing, shouts the acoustic shock day. In shouted that, fight wolves!pursues (a wolf belt arrow wound to go on stage) wolf: I originally am come from the north wolf, but in today the arrow was injured (wolf lamely to run) [ Mister Dongguo to carry on the book pouch, on the one hand walks on the other hand self-effacingly recites poetry.) Guo: From a pot of wine among the flowers I drank alone. There was no one with me -- Till, raising my cup, I asked the bright moon To bring me my shadow and make us three. (Between the flower a pot liquor, drinks alone without the intimate. Raises glass invites the bright moonlight, becomes three people to the shade) (suddenly to discover on road crowd of ants, heart of the mercy, has lifted a foot does not endure to lay down) Guo: (Reads) walks not injuries the cricket 蚁命 manner to have to have the mercy heart (cautiously to bypass ant, after continues to lead the way) (field shout big quake) Guo: What happened next? The United States military has joined battle with Iraq? (Wolf runs has come up) the wolf: The adult saves a life, behind had a hunter to have to peel my skin, rescued me! Guo: Good good, is the person to want to be sincere (was saying behind, dismounts the package, all but actually came out the inside book) Guo: You first hide in this package (wolf lamely sneak in package) (Mister Dongguo to carry book pouch, continues to walk) (on hunter) the hunter asks Guo: Ask scholar's, has seen the wolf which was injured to pass a moment ago? Guo: Not. Hunter: Thanks gentleman. After (under hunter) (waits hunter to walk far, Mister Dongguo put wolf from book pouch has gotten down) Guo: The hunter walked, you in a big hurry escape the wolf: Is not I does not want to walk, I really am tired hungry Guo: What then you do want to eat? Wolf: I must eat your meat! ! (Reveals fierce and antagonistic expression) Guo: Why then you do want to eat me? I have graciousness and you Wolf: Because you me stuffily in book pouch too long Guo: Really is the good intention not good newspaper. Is not good, I must go ask the person to figure out! (Said, brings wolf to go) (to walk to an old tree under) Guo: Sets up eldest sister, I rescued the wolf, the wolf have actually had to eat me. You to me comment this principle! Tree: Should eat! (Wolf self-satisfied has smiled) the tree: Your humanity endlessly cutted the piece of trees, continually our these old trees do not let off, burns us with the fire. Why can't the wolf eat you? Ate you to be able few individual to damage the nature (under old tree, wolf slowly approached Mister Dongguo) (by now on cow) Guo: Holds on a minute, lets me ask Niu eldest brother Guo: Eldest brother Niu, my good intention has rescued this wolf, now it actually must eat me. Should you said? Cow: This! Our Lao Niu gives birth to must do this for your humanity to do that, drinks or our milk. But we only eat the worst fodder every day, rest the worst cowshed, you also had to dig up our cowhide to make money. The old wolf should eat you. Wolf: (Sneers). Looked you also have any flattery (under cow) (on farmer) Guo: And so on one and so on, the distant place has come an old farmer. Asks him to figure out, if he said you should eat me, I have complied with. Wolf: Good, I give you last the opportunity. Guo: The old uncle, I has rescued this wolf, it actually ungratefully must eat me. You said this makes sense? The farmer asks the wolf: Why did you want to eat your savior? Wolf: He too has been stuffily long me in the book pouch, almost suffocates me (farmer to take up book pouch, about about looks at) the farmer: Was this book pouch such small, how many installs the book all not to be able to install, how installed under you? Or you demonstrate to me have a look? Wolf: The demonstration (said on the demonstration, earth-boring auger has leisurely gone in) the farmer to settle on the time, grips tightly the book pouch mouth, ties up with the string. The wolf on is stranded in the inside farmer: Silly scholar, the wild animal eventually is a wild animal, could not change natural disposition. Is the person surely not to be able to be excessively benevolent! Guo: (Nod name is) indeed indeed, declines office due to old age the uncle to teach the farmer: Then the present, we solved it (say. Two people treat the book pouch to pummel, the farmer also uses the hoe to pound the wolf. The wolf sends out the sorrowful bugle call in inside, one could not not then have the sound of something astir) (farmer and Mister Dongguo shook hand, separates from each other) The curtain falls, all actor goes on stage. 时间 古代。
人物 东郭先生、狼 、猎人、老杏树，老牛、老农。
” 荒野中烟尘滚滚，喊声震天。
内喊：“打狼啊，追啊 （一狼带箭伤上场，） 狼：我本是一只来自北方的狼，无奈今天中箭受了伤 （狼一瘸一拐跑下） 〔东郭先生背着书囊上，边走边摇头晃脑地念诗。
） 郭： From a pot of wine among the flowers I drank alone. There was no one with me -- Till, raising my cup, I asked the bright moon To bring me my shadow and make us three. （花间一壶酒，独酌无相亲。
举杯邀明月，对影成三人） （忽然发现路上一群蚂蚁，顿起慈悲之心，已举起的一只脚不忍放下） 郭： （念）走路莫伤蝼蚁命 为人要有慈悲心 （小心翼翼地绕过蚂蚁，继续前行） （后场喊声大震，） 郭：又发生了什么事
美军又与伊拉克交战了吗
（狼跑过上来） 狼：大人救命，后面有个猎人要剥了我的皮，救救我吧
郭：好吧好吧，做人要厚道 （说着，卸下背后的包，把里面的书都倒了出来） 郭：你先躲在这个包里吧 （狼一瘸一拐地钻进包里） （东郭先生背着书囊，继续走） （猎人上，） 猎人问郭： 请问秀才，刚才看见一只受伤的狼过去了吗
郭：没有啊。
猎人：谢谢先生。
（猎人下） （待猎人走远后，东郭先生把狼从书囊里放了下来） 郭：猎人已走，你快快逃命去吧 狼：不是我不想走，我实在是又累又饿 郭：那你要吃什么
狼：我要吃你的肉
（露出凶狠表情） 郭：那你为何要吃我
我有恩与你 狼：因为你把我闷在书囊里太久了 郭：真是好心没好报。
不行，我要去找人评理
（说完，带着狼向前去） （走到一棵老树下）郭：树大姐，我救了狼，狼却要吃我。
你给我评评这个理
树：该吃
（狼得意的笑了） 树：你们人类无休止地乱砍乱伐，连我们这些老树也不放过，用火来烧我们。
狼为什么不能吃你呢
吃了你就能少个人来祸害大自然了 （老树下，狼慢慢逼近东郭先生） （这时牛上了） 郭： 且慢，让我去问问牛大哥 郭：牛大哥，我好心救了这只狼，现在它却要吃我。
你说该不该
牛：该
我们老牛生下来就要为你们人类干这干那，喝的还是我们的奶。
可我们每天只吃最差的草料、睡最差的牛棚，你们还要扒了我们的牛皮去赚钱。
老狼该吃你。
狼：（冷笑）。
看你还有什么好说的 （牛下）（农夫上） 郭：等一等，远处来了一位老农夫。
找他评理，要是他说你该吃了我，我就遵从。
狼：好，我就给你最后一次机会。
郭：老伯，我救了这只狼，它却忘恩负义地要吃我。
你说这有道理吗
农夫问狼：你为何要吃了你的救命恩人
狼：他把我闷在书囊里太久了，差点闷死我 （农夫拿起书囊，上下左右看了看） 农夫：这书囊这么小，装书都装不了多少，怎么装的下你
要不你示范给我看看
狼：示范就示范 （说完，慢慢悠悠地钻了进去） 农夫看准时间，把书囊口扎紧，用绳子绑好。
狼就被困在里面了 农夫：傻秀才啊，野兽终究是野兽，改不了本性的。
做人千万不能过分仁慈
郭：（点头称是）的确的确，多谢老伯教诲 农夫：那么现在，我们就把它“解决了吧” （说罢。
两人对着书囊拳打脚踢，农夫还用锄头砸狼。
狼在里面发出哀号声，不一会便没了动静） （农夫与东郭先生握了握手，分道扬镳） 幕落，全体演员上场。
剧本是我自己写的，希望给你帮上忙啊
求一个搞笑小品，6人表演，要求台词带有简单英语。
话剧可以不
6人英语话剧小剧本-小红帽Little Red Riding Hood第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家 Mum： (妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里） Little Red Riding Hood:(唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing? Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma. Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok! Mum： （亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说） Be good. Be careful. Little Red Riding Hood： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy. Mum： Bye-bye. Darling. 第二场：在路上 (一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁) Little Red Riding Hood： Wow
Flowers, how beautiful! （放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers. Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf. I am hungry. (做找东西状,东张西望) Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going? (做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼) Little Red Riding Hood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)To Grandma’s．Grandma is ill. Wolf：（自言自语）I' ll eat Grandma. But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look! 6 little baby ducks. Little Red Riding Hood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞) Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后） Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby ducks，how are you? Six Ducks：We’ re fine．Thank you． Where are you going? Little Red Riding Hood：To Grandma’s．Oh, I must go, bye. Six Ducks：Goodbye． 第三场：Grandma家 Grandma： （喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。
） Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now. (做找寻的样子)Where is Grandma’ s house? (高兴地对观众说)Aha , it’s here.(敲门)Bang, Bang, Bang． Grandma： Who is it
Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’s me. Little Red Riding Hood. Grandma： (边说边起床) Come in, come in. Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边) Grandma , I’ll eat you. Grandma： （惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上） 灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。
Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy
I’ll sleep. Little Red Riding Hood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma． Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音) Who is it
Little Red Riding Hood：It’s me。
Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise! Wolf：Come in， Come in. Little Red Riding Hood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh! What are big ears! Wolf：I can listen to your sweet voice. Little Red Riding Hood：Wow! What a big eyes! Wolf：I can see you pretty face. Little Red Riding Hood：Oh! What a big hand. Wolf：I can hug you. Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look! What a big hands? Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)I can eat you! Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh
No! No! Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’s delicious. I still sleep. I like sleeping. Hunter： (一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’s the wolf? Look! A door．(推门)The wolf is sleeping. Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声) Hunter： (端起枪想打，又放下)What a big stomach! (摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry．(从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起) Look! Scissors. (做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, cut. Little Red Riding Hood\\\/Grandma：Thank you． Hunter： Grandma ,give me some needles and thread． Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones． Grandma： (从桌子上拿来针线) Little Red Riding Hood：(搬来几个石头)One, two, three. Hunter： (把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里) Grandma： I'll thread it. Hunter： (拿起枪)Woke up! Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)My stomach is so heavy. Hunter： You big bad wolf, raise your arms! Wolf：(边跑边说) Help! Don’t shot me! Hunter： （开枪）Bang, bang! Wolf： (应声倒下) Hunter： The bad wolf is dead． Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah! Thank you． Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you
四人演的二十分钟左右的搞笑英语话剧,一对一句翻译适合初一的
《 荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside )\\\/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman剑客 and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众） I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister?阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才
然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate?阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK?阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK. I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁Are you challenging me?荆轲Off course! 耸耸肩表示同意李莫愁Come on!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。
。
。
。
”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person. Don't we? Do we? （赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么
）李莫愁：Momma always said: Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you're gonna get. I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”?荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife?太子丹晕倒荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please?荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now! （本文来自天空剧本网）太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card?荆：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look! She is the most beautiful girl in the world. If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?荆柯; Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer.阿三：Excuse me? What’s the TCM?观众甲：TCM - Traditional Chinese MM 太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荆柯（激动）：Slimming减食疗法 tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧
难道你真的想要吗……荆柯(诚恳状) Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）荆珂挽着妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。
停顿。
《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose在船头的经典造型，忽然荆轲看到一个美女——此时一个中国古典美女经过，向荆轲抛媚眼，并抛下定情手绢。
荆轲高兴的盯着美女看，妻子发觉不对，扭过头来。
）荆珂（急忙收敛）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you! You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪) ：I love you more. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. (哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well. Be a man, just do it! I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart! You must do me this honor... promise me you will survive... that you will never give up... no matter what happens... no matter how hopeless... promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:I promise.荆轲:Never let go. “妻子:I promise. I will never let go, Jack. I'll never let go.（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。
）妻子努力挤出几滴眼泪，荆珂上船，渐渐远去妻子：It’s a good day to die. Never come back. Never…… Never……妻子(掏出手机拨号，阿三接手机)： Thank you very much. As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account.阿三：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.
关于搞笑英语小品的剧本有中文的
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三人英语幽默话剧，每个人台词差不多一样多的，每个人的台词不超过十句，在线等
急急急
两个人的行今天我正在看碟，老妈捧了本书进说道：给我讲讲这话什么意思 老这个“i don’t know.”是什么意思
我说：“我不知道” 老妈：送你上大学上了几年，你怎么什么都不知道
我说：不是
就是“我不知道”吗
老妈：还嘴硬$@%!#$^&%#$%@$%@#$%!^%^!^%$^#&.......(一顿爆揍) 老妈：你在给我说说这个。
“i know”是什么意思你该知道吧，给我说说。
我说：是，我知道 老妈：知道就快说。
我说：就是“我知道” 老妈：找茬呀你
刚才收拾你收拾的轻了是不
我说：就是我知道呀
老妈：知道你还不说
不懂不要装懂
&*$%^@$#!%$@^%#*$^^^##$%(又一顿爆揍) 老妈：你给我小心点，花那么多钱送你上大学，搞的现在什么都不会，会那么一丁点东西还跟老娘摆谱，再问你最后一个，你给我好好解释一下，说不出来我在收拾你，你给我翻译一下“i know but i don’t want to tell you.”是什么意思
我晕倒，拿起枕头往头上爆砸三十几下，用头撞墙四十多下，双手轮番抽自己嘴巴五十多下，用腿踢桌子角六十多下，血肉模糊之时，我问老妈：这下你满意吧
这不她老人家又来问我了:儿啊,i`m veryannoyance,don`t tuouble me .是什么意思啊~? 我:我很烦,别烦我 老妈:“找打,跟你妈这么说话”(于是被扁) 老妈又问;“I hear nothing,repeat. 是what意思啊” 我说:“我没听清,再说一次” 老妈又说了一遍：i hear nothing,repeat “我没听清,再说一次” 结果被扁 老妈再问:“what do you say ”又怎么解释呢 我说:“你说什么“(再次被扁) 老妈再问:“look up in the dictionary”是何意啊 我说:查字典 “查字典我还问你做甚”(被扁) 老妈又问:you had better ask some body.怎么翻呢 我说:你最好问别人 你是我儿子,我问别人干吗,又找打。
啊!god save me ! 耍你老妈玩,上帝也救不了你!(被扁) 我再问你:use you head,then think it over,又是什么意思啊! 我说:动动脑子,再仔细想想 “臭小子,还敢耍我“接着又要动手 我连忙说:是世上只有妈妈好的意思 “嗯,这还差不多,一会我给你做好吃的,明天再问你“
求几部英语篇的小品
中间最好有中文台词的
顺便说几部搞笑的传统小...
你可以搜一个叫《荆轲刺秦王》小品，有英文版的，你可以再修改一下，我们演出过，效果很不错。
